


rapids

by asterisk_hq



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Panic Attack, Self-Harm, don't read if you get triggered by that, or by the depression that usually comes with ryoma, that's literally it - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-01
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-10-02 03:10:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17256488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asterisk_hq/pseuds/asterisk_hq
Summary: It's like being dragged up the river the wrong way, hurting and wondering why before realizing that's my hands on my throat.





	rapids

**Author's Note:**

> Uh, I put it in the tags, but basically, if you get triggered by panic attacks, depression, self-harm, or self-loathing, don't read this.

I shut the door behind me, and the lock clicks into place.

Suddenly, for no good reason at all, my chest seizes up. My whole body feels heavy, like someone is dragging me against the current, like I'm being sucked into the rapids and hitting every rock in the way.

My heart hurts. It hurts so much. _Why won't it stop?_

My head explodes in pain, and soon I’m clawing at my face, my mouth open in a soundless scream. Without warning, my entire body is plunged into the icy depths.

I can't breathe. _I can’t breathe. I can't breathe I can’t breathe Ican’tbreatheHELPME!_

There’s no one.

I try to scream, but something grabs my throat, squeezing and choking—

God, it’s so cold. Why is there something hot stinging down my cheeks?

_No one can love someone like you. Why would anyone want to help you?_

Blood pounds in my head, and it’s like my brain is spinning a hundred times faster than it normally can.

 _No one cares about you. Someone who was blessed with such a wonderful talent, someone who let his damned pride get in the way and let everyone die because he was so_ selfish _!_

I suddenly become quite aware why I can’t breathe. My fingers fall away from my throat, but it still feels like I’m being strangled.

Black spots start to appear in my vision, dancing, mocking me.

_You should have helped someone with your talent, but no, you used it to kill, you let them kill your precious people, you hurt everyone, you’re worthless!_

It’s so cold. I’m so cold. I’m so tired. I– I– I don’t– I don’t want to– Please don't make me, I don’t deserve it, I don’t want to, don’t make me—

I surface and suck cold air in, filling my greedy, ungrateful lungs.

I wish the rapids were really here.

I wish they would drown me. 

**Author's Note:**

> hahahahaha it's 4 am and i haven't slept kill me


End file.
